Black, White and more Grays

Back when I was in grade school, things were simple. Things were black and white, right and wrong. Mistakes were questioned as I couldn’t understand how people could do bad things to others. Back then, I had a list of things to do and rules to follow. There were restrictions that were clearly needed to be followed due to consequences that may arise. I had a list of things to ponder upon whenever I examined my conscience for confession. It was so clear and simple.

Darren Moore 1

Then came high school when I learned more about Christian Philosophy and Theology. Though things were still supposed to be black and white, my classes taught me that a person’s actions may be separated from who the person really is. That even though a person does evil things, this does not follow that the person is evil. I know that this is true because I would like to believe that people are innately good. Economists were even able to prove that there really is altruism in people.

Given this, no matter how black and white things should be, sometimes, it’s just so hard to simply forgive and forget. I guess this is where all the grays come in. Sometimes, even though you would like to believe that you’ve forgiven someone, it comes back to haunt you sometimes. It just creeps in no matter how hard you try to push it away.

Darren Moore 2

I have friends who have broken up with their boy friends because of cheating issues but after a few months they still find it in themselves to forgive and go back to the relationship. Maybe, if I were still younger, I wouldn’t understand. It has never happened to me so I think it would still be a deal breaker but I think it would be a very complicated situation. I wouldn’t know what I would do until that situation presents itself.

When relationship problems of friends are shared to me and their decisions are in conflict with what I believe I would have done, I just stop and listen. I just try to understand and accept. Maybe things have a way of falling into place. Things are not black and white when it comes to forgiveness. There are miracles, faith and other unexplainable things called love that can endure many things. Maybe we just need to believe that there is good in everything?

Darren Moore 3

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Photo Credit: Darren Moore from emorfes

About Mariel Tan

Artist at heart who shares the spice in her life. Visit my blogs:


  1. DTF

    Lovely reflection! Maybe true forgiveness is possible only when the offense is seemingly unforgivable? Kinda like how charity becomes Charity only when we love those who seemingly don’t deserve it (otherwise, “where is challenge in that?”). Maybe forgiveness is so gray is because, rather than resting on our intellects, it rests on our wills where all the vagaries of the human heart are carried..

    Btw, I had those Christian Philosophy/Theology classes too! Though I think Springdale was late with that program cus it was still developing the curriculum acc to older PAREF schools. haha puro multiple choice! what is black and white. :))


    • Yes! You explain things so well with words =)) I love that additional idea. :)) Now I’m thinking of reading more philosophical stuff… which I think you’re so much better at! =)))) Any book suggestions?


      • DTF

        Haha maybe I just space out more :))

        books? Hmm, I just love CS Lewis! Haha I have a good feeling you’ll like “The Four Loves” it’s just him casually writing on four ways Love moves in our relationships – affection, friendship, eros, and charity. lol it really blew me away 😀


  2. Those pictures are amazing – did you take them? They go wonderfully with your post!


  3. Reblogged this on Dolce Vita and commented:

    Stumbled upon an old entry of mine 2 years ago. What a good reminder this Holy Week. Happy Easter to all!



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